“No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.” -Charles Dickens
Think about the last time you gave something away–a gift, clothing or money. How did it make you feel? How did it make the person receiving the gift feel?
Sharing with others is not in our nature. I fully started to see this once I became a parent of two. We as human beings are wired to be selfish, not selfless. My daughter and son always want what the other one has–sound familiar? So how do we learn to share if it’s not in our nature. My kids learned and are still learning how to share. Sharing is a constant battle internally and externally. Daily they make little advances in sharing. From what I can tell in kids and adults, people like to see other people smile and they enjoy being positively reinforced.
Sharing was, is and will continue to be a win, win situation. My kids now say the same little thing that I said when I was a kid, “Sharing is caring.” When words rhyme, then they remember, and this is something I want them to remember. Often out of blue, when it’s not a sharing situation, I’ll say, “Sharing is…” and one or both of them will say “caring.”
For me giving to others can be very challenging because I am the oldest of five children and four of us were boys. So my sister had her own room and the boys had two sets of bunk beds to share. I always wanted my own room, my own dresser, my own this, and my own that. I had to fight the urge to be selfish in my adolescence and young adult life. If you want to verify that then just ask one of my three brothers or my sister.
I like to think I changed somewhere along the way, and I think it was in my 20’s in the Marine Corps. When I went into the Marine Corps I learned a ‘few’ wonderful things from “A Few Good Men.” They became part of my being, and I chose to adopt many of their traits. The Marine Corps also has 14 Leadership Traits that they drill into you, no seriously, you have to memorize them and they use a nifty little acronym, JJ DID TIE BUCKEL.
Justice, Judgement—Decisiveness, Initiative, Dependability—Tact, Integrity, Endurance—Bearing, Unselfishness, Courage Knowledge, Loyalty, Enthusiasm.
I highlight two of the 14 Leadership Traits because those two stand out in my mind when I think of sharing or giving of yourself or your things. In the Marine Corps, especially in bootcamp, it is not about you–it is about everyone–it is about the mission and troop welfare and morale. Never leave a man behind. The team is only as strong as the weakest link. Everyone pays for the mistake of one… and so on. As a group, you learn to work together to improve the situation for the group. It truly is an amazing change and it does not happen unless the Marine Recruit buys into and fully invests in the traits of Unselfishness and Enthusiasm.
Once the Recruit buys into Unselfishness and Enthusiasm, then things start to click. I help him make his bed faster today, and the next day when I need help cleaning my rifle, then he’s there for me. The narrow view about me just trying to survive goes away. It is replaced by a broader view of the group and how can we get this done sooner, faster, and better than the drill instructors. The idea about just trying to survive in bootcamp is replaced by wanting to thrive in bootcamp. This is an amazing transformation.
Another way the Marine Corps makes you ‘forget’ it is about you is in the way you speak. When you speak to drill instructors you do not use ‘I’ to refer to yourself. If you wanted to say ask the drill instructor a question and your name was John Doe you would say, “Sir, Recruit Doe requests knowledge, sir.” They remove the thought of self and replace it with a more globally focused idea. So the next time you are debating whether or not to share, please know your children are watching.
Sharing brings joy to those who may be unhappy.
Sharing even a small amount of money does help.
Sharing provides someone with something they didn’t have before.
Sharing does improve poverty.
Sharing can reduce your taxes.
Sharing causes you to appreciate what you have more.
Sharing 10% and investing 10% of your income before paying the bills make your last 80% hold a little more value.
Sharing improves the decisions you make with the money you have left over because you will tend to be more frugal when you have less and therefore becoming a better steward of your finances.
Sharing is caring. Every time I have shared something–money, time, service–I ultimately get back more than I give. If you don’t believe it, then try sharing. When we give we change ourselves and others from the inside out. Winston Churchill says best in the quote below.
Just as a reminder the information I provide is for educational purposes, please do your own research and make your own decisions based upon that research. I care about you and want the best for you, but ultimately you should make an informed personal decision.
“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.” —Winston Churchill
Your Assignment.
Not in a relationship— And don’t have any children, then share money, donate time, or just give back to society through service.
In a relationship—And married with children or in a significant relationship then, please share your money, time and/or service. Your family is watching you and they will model you and your actions. Show them the way you want them to go. Tell them a story, or better yet, do it together.